Midwest Excellence Recommends: Baseball on Old AM Radios and Icy Cup Affogatos

Mandy had to run an errand on Sunday afternoon, leaving me to my own devices for a couple hours on a postcard-perfect day. I had zero interest in doing anything productive; the yard was mowed, the laundry folded, the gym visited*. I knew the Twins game was on the radio and we recently acquired a new/old appliance.

Get a load of this beast:

This behemoth belonged to Mandy's parents, circa roughly 1979. To answer your questions in the order they were received:

• Yes, it weighs about 400 pounds.
• Yes, that is an 8-track player.
• No, I don't know if it works. If one of you has your old man's Red Headed Stranger 8-track in a shoebox somewhere, send it my way.
• No, the record player doesn't work.
• Yes, that is Gerry Rafferty's City to City.

The radio works perfectly well. Not to brag, but this beauty gets both AM and FM signals. I can get the soybean reports on the former and all the Bob Seger I can handle on the latter. Who's got it better than me?

With every window in the house open, I put the game on, set my phone down, sat on the porch, and watched Bidwell Street go about its long weekend. The neighbors worked on their fence, couples walked their dogs and pushed their strollers, and kids rode past on their bikes.

(I realize that I live in an urban hellhole where I'm lucky to be alive at the end of every day, but the most dangerous thing I observed was a skateboarder without a helmet. I assume she was in the Antifa?)

As the Twins got to an early 3-1 lead over Boston, the warmth of the late May sun almost sent me to the nearest couch for a nap, but I'm fortunate to live near the Icy Cup, a former Dairy Queen that's open from April-October on St. Paul's West Side. They offer soft serve, coffee, or BOTH AT THE SAME TIME.

It's called an affogato, and the Icy Cup version features a heap of vanilla soft serve with two shots of espresso. I strolled over, purchased one, and the caffeine hit me with something approaching ferocity. I could see through time. It took me 45 seconds to write the preceding 300 words. I might go run around the block a few times.

The Twins blew that lead while I was walking to and fro, but as I finished the adult milkshake back on the porch and calculated pi to the 1000th digit in my head, they recaptured the lead on their way to a 6-5 victory. A nice little Sunday afternoon.

Obviously, not everyone reading this is a baseball fan and no one has a radio this fucking cool, but there really is something to be said for slowing down, putting the phone in airplane mode, and just taking in the day. Swap the ballgame out for a tacky paperback about espionage or sullen vampires or some lady smut called, like, Her Husband's Wife. Wander over to your own neighborhood spot for a refreshment or just treat yourself to a full-strength Coca-Cola out of the fridge. You've earned it, Midwest Excellence subscriber.

I hope you all had a great long weekend. If you were working, I hope you were compensated fairly and/or tipped generously. Tell me about it in the comments or just share your oldest still-functioning appliance. Someone's got a sweet Discman out there I bet.

*Gym brag.